Ep. 57: "It's Not That Bad"

Image: Money Pit, 1986

Image: Money Pit, 1986


Show notes

Alt. episode title: "Examine What You Tolerate". This week, we recount times when we've told ourselves "It's not that bad" when in reality, it was that bad--and actually a lot worse. Why do we do that? What's the price? And how can you be onto yourself before you dig yourself into a too-deep hole?

We talked about

  • Laura being back from Florida and adorable cat cleanings

  • funny FaceTime shenanigans with Meadow

  • feeling trapped in an awkward Airbnb experience with no working Wi-Fi

  • taking a stroll down a dusty highway in search of food

  • hissing sounds while trying to fall asleep

  • having to write an ironically-titled chapter for her book

  • being in denial the whole time until she finally books into a hotel

  • having productive days despite it all

  • politeness and the fear of hurting others’ feelings

  • feeling invested to stay in an unwanted situation

  • Meadow’s harrowing nail salon trip in Orange County

  • a binder, a microphone, some glitter nails, and Abba’s Dancing Queen

  • Meadow ceasing her perpetual politeness via email

  • setting boundaries as a customer early so you look less like a jerk

  • how many first dates Meadow went on after her divorce

  • her last bad first date and cutting it short.


 “You wanted to be polite, and you don’t fight for yourself and you don’t fight for your career. And it seems like kindness, but it’s at your expense.”

“When you’re getting your nails done, you shouldn’t be afraid. You shouldn’t be in PTSD mode.”

“I treat you as if you are the enemy. If you are on a first date with me, I act as if you’re trying to murder me. So no, you’re not going to know where I live. I will meet you at your house...”

Ask yourself

  • If you’re telling yourself it’s not that bad, what if it is? And what if you don’t have to do the thing you’re doing, even for another second longer? 

  • What if looking like a jerk is 100% inevitable? Will you choose to do it now or later?



FaceTime app

Dancing Queen by Abba

Music by Izzy DeVor.

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Spiritualish, Meadow, and Laura


Spiritualish is hosted by Laura McKowen and Meadow DeVor. Sometimes spiritual, always inappropriate. New episodes drop every Thursday.

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