The process of creating change is a temporary condition.
It begins with the decision to change the status quo. It continues as you undergo the procedures, efforts, consequences and actions of creating The Change. And, it terminates at the point where The Change has been made.
Our Target is the point where present tense becomes past tense. We are no longer changing. We’ve changed.
The debt isn’t being paid off. It has been paid off.
We’re no longer losing weight. The weight has been lost.
We’re not quitting. We’ve quit.
We’re not starting. We’re doing it.
The target isn’t The End.
This is only a target to reach. It’s a fixed point with a clear definition.
Upon arrival of this target, there will be different work to be done. There will be a new goal. With new actions needed. But let’s not get ahead of ourselves.
What’s important is understanding this target right now. In vivid detail. Because if you can’t see this target - there is no way that you will be able to hit it.
We need to understand that the work required to get to the target is temporary work. It’s not forever. It’s not a life sentence.
There’s a beginning to it. And there’s an end. Even if the end is really, really, really far away. There is still an end.
You will not be paying off debt for the rest of your life.
For a long time? Perhaps. But not forever.
You will not be working to lose weight for the rest of your life.
Can it take an excruciatingly long time? Yah. Of course.
But you can change it.
And after you hit the target - it will be changed.
As in: past tense. It’s done.
It’s hard for some of us to wrap our minds around the idea that one day we’ll actually be debt free. Believe me. When I started, I was nearly $600k in debt. I didn’t even entertain the idea of being debt free in my lifetime. I learned to tolerate debt. I thought it was just part of life.
Until I got the crazy idea that I actually could pay off debt. Like, really pay it off. And be done. Even if it took me 10 years. Or even 20. There would actually be an end to the debt. I wasn’t dealing with infinity. I was dealing with a fixed number. A big number - yes. But it was still fixed. And if I had made the decision to stop it from growing, I could certainly decide to make the number smaller. One month at a time.
Once I defined that target in my mind, the focus became very clear. I saw that it wasn’t a moving target. It was a very defined point in time. And no matter how far in the future it was, I knew that it was possible to create it.
This same concept applies to our bodies. Maybe you’ve been ‘trying to lose 20 pounds’ for the last friggin’ 20 years. Maybe you want to lose 100 pounds. Or more. Don’t let big numbers scare you. And don’t let your past define you.
Extra weight (debt, or anything else) isn’t something that you need to learn to tolerate. Life isn’t about lowering your standards for yourself.
Losing weight isn’t a life-long process. It’s temporary. There’s a beginning, middle and end to it.
But, you’ve really got to determine what your “end” looks like. (And please don’t tell me that it’s a fucking number on little box in your bathroom. )
Maybe it’s a pair of jeans. A dress.
Maybe it’s being able to run a mile. Or swim with your kids. Finish a triathlon. Ski black diamond. Stand up on a surfboard.
Maybe it’s being able to buy something in your size at a regular department store. Or tuck your shirt in.
I’ll tell you what a target isn’t: it isn’t a feeling. It isn’t ‘feeling comfortable in your skin.’ It isn’t ‘being confident.’ It isn’t ‘loving your body.’
Don’t get me wrong - those are all wonderful things - but they are feelings. And any feeling is available to any one of us at anytime by changing the way we think.
Thoughts and feelings are not targets. Targets are definable destinations or goals. They are measurable. They are factual.
And most importantly.
They are attainable.